I couldn’t for the life of me identify what kind of insect this is. If anyone can, let me know! The closest I got was something close to the stinkbug, or perhaps a leaf-footed bug, but neither is quite right.
Update! Thanks to some clever sleuthing and the help of a relative’s knowledgeable friend, we now know this is an Assassin Bug. These critters ambush their prey and stab them with the long “beak” you see right beneath its head. Venom is then injected into the helpless victim, liquifying its insides for the assassin bug to slurp up. Apparently they’ll stab humans if mishandled, so give them some room!